I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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