All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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