Pregnant stripper...not hot.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
He has the fingertips of a God
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
