Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
