So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
he was CRYING into my vagina
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Best friends brother. Beat that.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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