What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
