Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
