Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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