South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize