I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I have aggressive nipples.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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