Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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