new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
