Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
