forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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