he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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