Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Randomize
