He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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