if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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