im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
