If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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