I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
