We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Randomize
