i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
