Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
