How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Randomize
