just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
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Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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