I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
