i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
