How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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