Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
