Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
