This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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