Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
