just survived the first fart of the relationship.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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