Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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