I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
