barbara walters just said penis...
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Never underestimate the power of titties
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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