can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
