How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
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