i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
