Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
