You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
