So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Oh god it's open bar.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
