Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
