I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
