called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
