he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Randomize
