that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
