remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
