Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
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